Friday, November 11, 2011

The Case of SMS from the Heaven


Science has gone beyond the widest realms of possibilities, things which are forefathers dismissed as flights of fancies are realities of today’s world. Yet there remain things to which we have no answers till today. Like a text from the Dead.

But Alas! This is not a blog dedicated to the serial “Mano Ya na Mano”.

Coming back to my story…

How will any body react if you get a text message from somebody who has already left this planet?

You will be shocked.

Surprised

If not anything Scared?

But the last thing you will expect is to try to grip your chair for support, trying to recover from a heavy blow on your left cheek, which has caused you a minor concussion. Well this happened to “Mr Atapattu”

Let me introduce my hero/villain depending upon how you see him

“Mr Atapattu”

Although a namesake of the famous Ex Sri-Lankan Cricketer whose first few scores at the international stage looked like a binary series or the guy who called his selectors Muppets, the only thing that they have got common is their name.

I have chosen this name, coz in Hindi his name closely symbolises flip-flops and utter confusion.

Here is presenting you without much ado-his first misadventure.

This was at a time when Mr. Atapattu was still studying architecture in his college; he was in the third year of his 4 year degree course. Very recently Mr. Atapattu had started seeing and had gotten steady with Ms. Cranberry. The heady romance of the new love had given way to the routine of a settled relationship & the inevitability of ending together. Things were running on a fine fettle.

But as they say “a leopard can never change its spots”. A man can never say no to a chance to flirt.

It started with the whole annual day celebrations. Mr Atapattu was the ace dancer in his college & it so happened that the main event of the function was a duet waltz dance to the tune of “Baahon ke Darmiyan- from the movie Khamoshi the Musical”

As it turned out Atapattu got paired up with this saucy, petite dame who went by the name Ms Choco-Chip. The long hours spent during the rehearsals and the soothing melody of one of the most romantic composition of all time had a mesmerizing effect on the handsome Atapattu & the PYT Choco-Chip. They never realised how, one thing led to another and….

But as Atapattu was already in a rock solid relationship with Ms Cranberry, there was not much scope for anything serious to brew between Atapattu & Choco-Chip. Thus began this whole game of hide & seek and the SMS coochie-coo. Wherein while being loyal to Cranberry who was anointed as his staple diet, Atapattu also had a light snack in the form of this tit-bit romance with Choco-Chip.

But as they the smooth sailing in relationship is as much a myth as Chinese govt claiming the presence Flying Dragons spewing fire stationed to protect “The Great Wall of China”,

It was Atapattu’s birthday and there it was, an ultra-romantic dinner planned to perfection by Ms Cranberry: Ah! With the heavenly aroma of his favourite Italian cuisine , the soothing sound of the waves, with a gentle cool night breeze for company & the soft melody of Kenny G being played live on a saxophone, it was a moment of eternal bliss.

The climax of the whole evening was about to arrive, as the gong of the grandfather clock was about to strike 12. Just before that particular moment Atapattu decided to take a loo break [the one which he has lived to regret forever.]

DHAN-TE-TAAN!!!!

Upon returning to the table the scene that greeted Atapattu’s eyes blew his mind off & sent him into a tailspin. The dishes were strewn helter-skelter; the table cloth had been torn to shreds. The beautiful birthday cake was meshed and vandalized beyond recognition under Ms Cranberry’s right heel. Ms Cranberry sweet loving pretty angelic face had been replaced by a face that resembled “Kali” the demonic incarnation of goddess Durga in an expression of rage unparalleled.

Utterly flummoxed Atapattu tried to make sense of the whole situation but failed miserably, he kept on asking Cranberry what was wrong? But she continued giving him I will chop you to smithereens look, instead of paying any heed to his questions. This went on for nearly 6 minutes and 32 seconds [At least that’s what the indicator on his new watch, gifted to him on that day itself by Ms Cranberry told him] finally the dam burst and in the midst of unbridled deluge of tears streaming from her eyes Ms Cranberry almost flung Atapattu’s phone which he had mistakenly left behind, on his face.

Still unable to fathom anything Atapattu tried to reason as to what it was, on his phone that had transformed Cranberry from Dreamgirl to Viscious Vamp?

Finally Ms Cranberry took the Atapattu’s phone and showed him a SMS which read “sweetest honey, wish you a very very happy b’day hope to see you 2moro”. Putting a brave face Atapattu said “oh! It’s nothing its’ just a simple birthday greeting.” Upon which Ms Cranberry pointed out who the sender was. This totally perplexed Atapattu coz it read Mr WHITE

FLASHBACK: Mr White was actually a senior of Atapattu & Cranberry, who had just passed away in a tragic skiing accident a couple of months back.

But as they say courage & intelligence are best seen in the midst of extreme adversity. He said to Cranberry “Darling look, this is the message from the heaven. Sweetie instead of getting upset you should acknowledge this act of God it’s a true MIRACLE!!! ”

P.S- Forever the disbeliever Ms Cranberry called the number which read WHITE. She put the phone on speaker mode. The dial tone started singing “Baahon ke Darmiyan- from the movie Khamoshi the Musical”. The person on the other line picked up the call as the second stanza was about to start, said instinctively “hi honey, muah! Happy b’day” Surprise Surprise that person sounded exactly like, guess who?

Ms Choco Chip of course.

Apparently Ms Cranberry had a sneaky suspicion of her indulging in some Namby-Pamby with her Atapattu & her voice on the other end only went on to reinforce the same. She went on to accuse him of infidelity towards her & said that Atapattu changed the name of Choco-Chip in his address book to Mr. White so as to fool her.

Atapattu swears that till date he has no idea how the person on the other line turned out to be Ms Choco-Chip’s. Ummm….BAFFLING.

But I believe him, and as I am sure many of you guys will feel the same “that sometimes people, who are dead, stay alive with us in spirit & this text is a living proof that people who no longer walk this earth can still leave an imprint for those whom they really care”.

And As for Choco-Chip’s voice on the other line, he says ……………….

U Bloody SCOUNDRELS!!!! Telecom Operators & Your CROSS CONNECTIONS…

DISCLAIMER: let me clarify it in Bold & Caps Lock –

THE CHARACTERS & EVENTS IN THE SERIES OF THESE BLOGS ARE PURELY FICTIONAL ANY SIMILARITES WITH THE EVENTS OR CHARACTERS IS PURELY CO-INCIDENTIAL.